Brené Brown — Striving versus Self-Acceptance, Saving Marriages, and More (#409) – The Blog of Author Tim Ferriss


“We chase extraordinary moments as an alternative of being grateful for atypical moments till arduous shit occurs. After which within the face of actually arduous stuff — sickness, loss of life, loss — the one factor we’re begging for is a standard second.”
—Brené Brown

Dr. Brené Brown (@BreneBrown) is a analysis professor on the College of Houston the place she holds the Huffington Basis – Brené Brown Endowed Chair at The Graduate School of Social Work. Brené can also be a visiting professor in administration at The College of Texas at Austin McCombs College of Enterprise.

She has spent the previous 20 years learning braveness, vulnerability, disgrace, and empathy and is the creator of 5 #1 New York Occasions bestsellers: The Gifts of Imperfection, Daring Greatly, Rising Strong, Braving the Wilderness, and her newest e book, Dare to Lead, which is the fruits of a seven-year research on braveness and management. Brené hosts the Unlocking Us podcast, and her TED discuss — The Power of Vulnerability — is one of the highest 5 most seen TED talks on the earth with over 45 million views. She can also be the primary researcher to have a filmed lecture on Netflix. The Call to Courage particular debuted on the streaming service on April 19, 2019.

Please take pleasure in Brené’s return to the present!

Hearken to the episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Overcast, Stitcher, Castbox, Google Podcasts, or in your favourite podcast platform. You too can watch the conversation on YouTube

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What was your favourite quote or lesson from this episode? Please let me know in the comments.


Need to hear one other episode with Brené Brown? — Hearken to her first appearance on this present wherein we focus on vulnerability, colleges of philosophy, and making a home-run TED Discuss (stream under or right-click here to obtain):


  • Join with Brené Brown:

Website | Unlocking Us Podcast | Twitter | Facebook | Instagram | LinkedIn


  • What’s it about Brené that elicits such an nearly universally enamored response from girls on the point out of her identify? [05:44]
  • As somebody who was unexpectedly thrust into the position of public determine when her TED Discuss went viral, how has Brené decided the place to attract traces and boundaries? [10:24]
  • On chasing the extraordinary as an alternative of embracing the atypical — till we’ve to face the actually arduous stuff life throws our manner. [14:54]
  • As a substitute of relegating it to her secret disgrace life, Brené bravely shares a narrative about what went on in her head when she was the uncomfortable topic of a latest photograph session. [15:54]
  • The place’s the road between being our greatest selves or striving for excellence, and embracing who we’re? Self-acceptance and complacency? Excellence and magnificence in all issues and perfectionism that’s paralyzing? [19:08]
  • Can you alter in an enduring, significant manner with out self-acceptance? Can there be such a factor as self-aware complacency? What in the event you’re delusional (or narcissistic) sufficient to consider you’re self-aware and self-accepting whereas being neither? [29:28]
  • Generally I fear that I’ve misplaced my viewers after we go off on threads like this one. Right here’s a confession that I hope doesn’t sound too woo about what I take into account the crux ability that underlies all others, and why I consider the questions I’m attempting to reply nowadays should not at odds with questions I’ve answered previously. [33:22]
  • Dialog’s not at all times an environment friendly course of, which is why this phase covers narcissism because the shame-based concern of being atypical, Brené’s shocking fanaticism for Rush (RIP Neil Peart), shifting viewers demographics, and no plans for writing The 4-Hour Self-Consciousness. [35:19]
  • “What are you unwilling to really feel?” Why we don pathological armor for defense and how we would take the primary steps in shedding it as soon as we discover the braveness to take action — hopefully earlier than we’re “midway to lifeless.” [37:55]
  • When such a call is made — normally round mid-life — what can we hope replaces the armor and turns into a superpower? [44:56]
  • No one makes it to maturity with out some form of trauma, and that trauma received’t allow you to discard that armor with out a combat — or the assistance of a therapist. [46:36]
  • When your trauma and dysfunction and issues pile up, you’re coping with it it doesn’t matter what. The query is: how are you coping with it? With the management that self-awareness brings, or underneath the management of what you’re up in opposition to? [47:20]
  • Not all modifications must take 20 or 30 years. With the proper sources, instruments, and help system (like an empathic important different), they are often made in a mere fraction of that point. [49:47]
  • Why getting married was the toughest factor Brené has ever achieved, and the hacks which have saved that marriage — and the entire household — going for 25 years. [53:05]
  • Does each member of the household have a vote within the decision-making course of at Brené’s home? How is energy distributed? [57:22]
  • Brené’s concept on parenting, the way it works in her family, and why her children observe the principles even after they’re not at dwelling. [58:23]
  • Why Brené inspired her super-academic daughter to decelerate and take pleasure in her time in highschool and school with out racing towards some grand finale profession determined upon at age 18. [1:00:03]
  • Why all people ought to should work a minimum of one — ideally two — service jobs early in life. [1:02:29]
  • 5 issues Brené has modified her thoughts about in the previous couple of years. [1:04:10]
  • 5 absurd, silly issues Brené does. [1:10:58]
  • 5 issues Brené is tremendous enthusiastic about. [1:16:18]
  • One final TikTok joke and parting ideas. [1:20:14]


The Tim Ferriss Show is one of the most well-liked podcasts on the earth with over 400 million downloads. It has been chosen for “Greatest of Apple Podcasts” 3 times, it’s typically the #1 interview podcast throughout all of Apple Podcasts, and it has been ranked #1 out of 400,000+ podcasts on many events. To take heed to any of the previous episodes without cost, take a look at this page.

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